Changing My Focus, or How I Stopped the Self-Pity Party and Started Living My Life

Last Friday night, I was watching the extra features that came with the movie The Source Code when I had an epiphany. The featurette was about quantum physics and how it relates to the nature of reality. It showed electrons moving in one direction when viewed under one microscope, but when viewed under a different microscope, the electrons moved in a different direction. This means that by changing the way we look at things, we change how things behave. In other words, reality isn’t fixed: changing what we focus on changes our outer world. It can shift in infinite ways depending on how we look at it.

When I thought this over, I realized that this is exactly what all the self-help and spiritual books have been saying all along – changing your thinking, changes your life. Even though I understood this concept, it was in seeing the science behind it that made it truly click. Until then, it was just a bunch of people telling me to think positively and to be grateful. Nice, but it was just a theory. Until Friday night. I guess I needed the scientific proof, something concrete to tell me that this is real.

After that, I started to fully take in what this means for my life. Lately, I’ve been spending a great part of my days focusing on all the things and people that make me unhappy. No wonder the things I want have been just out of reach – I’ve been pushing them away by focusing on the wrong thing.

Louise Hay, the author of Heal Your Life, says that life is easy, but we make it enormously hard for ourselves. Probably because: our focus is on what we don’t want. Just like the electrons changing directions when seen from another perspective, my life can be enormously easy and enjoyable if I choose to see it that way.

After having this epiphany, it took some work shifting my thinking toward what I want. After a couple of tries it got easier. And easier. I’ve been having difficulties with a co-worker lately. For the last few days my thinking was solely about what was wrong with this relationship. It didn’t occur to me to focus on what I would like it to be. Now when I think about this person, I see us supporting each other and enjoying each other’s company. I’ll have to wait until I see her again to know if things are truly different, but I already feel changed. And maybe that’s all I need.

Suddenly everything makes sense.


4 thoughts on “Changing My Focus, or How I Stopped the Self-Pity Party and Started Living My Life

  1. I am a total supporter of quantum physics and met a person the last year who continued to tell me my positive optimistic outlook on life was wrong, until mine became like his; negative, out of control, and blind to all of life’s wonders. It was good to read an article that reaffirms my beliefs. Hopefully my life can make the same turn around.

    1. Thank you for your comment.

      It is really important to focus on what we want, rather than spending our energy on negativity.

      Wishing you a speedy turn around.

  2. This is really good stuff. Thank you for your thoughtfulness and generousity….sharing such life changing thoughts.

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